I've undergone a radical change in my life recently.
I'll leave the details for another time, but needless to say- it was not entirely desired, anticipated, and completely different from the road I thought my life was going to be on for the better part of the last two decades.
I've read tons of self-help articles. Watched myriad YouTube videos about self-compassion, self-love, self-care...
Three things have stood out in previous experiences and this one that have made a huge difference from the last time my life diverged as much as it has this time.
1. Mediation, self-reflection, is a total game changer. I did this before and it works. How you do it doesn't matter. There are plenty of places that talk about how, but the first time I knew this and it worked- which is probably why I am relatively sane this time around.
2. Completely different this time. I have my dog. Zuri, the yellow lab. She has been a life-saver in many ways, but the main is to illustrate and remind me of the possibility of unconditional love. We fool ourselves into think that it is even a good ideal to have for personal relationships of any stripe, but it is not a possibility. Sure, it would be a nice ideal, but no human can perform the way a dog can.
3. The final key difference: journaling. Again, I do not care how you do it. I did it with a therapist for the first time and it was revelatory. The process of taking the time to maintain thoughts and occurances, document reactions, and then go back to understand. This was a life saver as well. It helped make sense where none could often be found. It provided a sounding board when often there was no other option. Finally, it requires discipline and habit that you need to get through some days.
I've maintained the thought journal but I think the one that helps the most is taking the time each day to share a brief though in my own "TV show" with Zuri: https://www.instagram.com/toddlyden/channel/
I am sure IGTV is going to die now because any time I commit to a platform for pretty much an extended period of time, I kill it.
However, take a moment at the beginning of each day to mention something that might help others and focus on the one element of my life that provides sustenance and love really helps me.
So do you need watch it? Nah. Do I need to do it? For now.
Either way, I would recommend if you are struggling with ANYTHING- take a moment to find a way for yourself to journal.